In the words of Chad from High School Musical, “Wildcats, Getcha head in the game!”
I have been trying to get my head back in the game of life for a while now, but man, it has been hard.
I had to let go of some Soroptimist committees and duties just so I could stay afloat, and since my second to last semester of college started the beginning of August I have been drowning. I will not sugarcoat it; it has been pretty rough balancing everything again and not falling apart.
I am on track to graduate with my AA degree this spring and I had a stressful start to this fall semester having been dropped from my communications class which I needed to complete this semester in order to graduate on time. I freaked out and had back-to-back email conversations with my professor, the academic counselors, and the admissions staff trying to figure out what happened and how to get me back in the class. I was told that I was “inactive” on canvas which is the source of all our course work and in my defense, it was only the fourth day of school and others who work full time know that having online classes that give out work on Monday and make it due by the following Sunday, you tend to do it closer to Thursdays and Fridays. So, the fact that I was dropped really threw me for a loop and caused a lot of stress. The following week I figured it out with the counseling staff and they got me back in the class and I went into ‘GO’ mode having now a week to catch up on.
I think it is funny how I am over here stressing out and sometimes falling into pieces but I am also the one doing it to myself. I am in control of how much is on my plate and what stays and what goes. I just have a hard time telling people no and/or delegating things to others.
I went from having nothing to having too much and it hits me quite often, more than I would like but it is okay. I have an amazing workplace that supports me and has my back, and some really great friends in my circle that understand what I am going through. I could not do it without them; they mean everything to me having them here by my side.
When this column comes out, I will have already been in Las Vegas for one week still having one more week to go. I get to stay two weeks with my mom to spend time with her and reconnect and also celebrate her birthday. Not seeing my mom as often as if she was living in town hurts and sucks more when I really need a hug from her or just her cooking and she is not here. I am forever grateful for her and all the support she gives me.
The day after I come back home, I have the awesome opportunity to attend my boyfriend’s mom’s wedding which I had the chance to help plan as well. Then 21 days later I get to attend another wedding, one of a coworker, so it is going to be a wedding filled October for sure.
Also, this September I got to celebrate my one-year anniversary with my boyfriend where he surprised me with the cutest simple promise ring that had an engraving on the inside that said “I love you.”
So, this month and the next have been jam packed and it is only the beginning.
I smile, attempt to breathe, try to get my head in the game, and take on what the day has to throw at me to my best abilities.
I am waiting for the day that it all makes sense, it all works out, and my mental health is back on track. I am waiting for that to happen so I can write that column talking about how everything finally fell into place.
Let’s see if I come out on top after the next couple weeks.
Sarah Lawson is a staff reporter for The Oakdale Leader, The Escalon Times and The Riverbank News; she can be reached at slawson@oakdaleleader.com.